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Friday, July 11, 2008

Consumer

This week, there were many compositions I had to write. Firstly, there was this composition entitled "Terrible Night". Honestly, I don't think my composition had anything to do with a terrible night. When I get my composition back, I'll write it here. Right now, I'll just describe it roughly. It's probably more towards fantasy. There is this part where dreams are in fact reality and there is this slight problem differentiating between dreams and the real world. Then, there's this MUSIC composition. Not much to say here....for those musicians, you know what to expect here... Finally, there's today's composition. Full of nonsense. It was about consumers' rights--And I totally ruined the whole point of the composition.

You see, I was actually having problems with the starting (as usual). Jhia Yim and I were trying to write something similar to that of Sha Lynn's but failed despite several attempts. In the middle of our brainstorming, Pn Angie had to go out for something....important, I guess. In desperation to make my brain work, I have come up with the best essay anyone in Form 2 could ever write:

We are all consumers. Firstly, let me define the term "consumers". Consumers are divided into 3 categories. There is the Primary Consumer, the Secondary Consumer and last but not least, the Tertiary Consumer. All consumers have their rights. Consumer rights differ depending on categories.

Oh, and before I forget, there is also the Producer. In the natural world, producers are defined as "things" which can manufacture its own food. These are mostly green plants. We therefore conclude that all storekeepers/factory workers/managers/service managers/product managers are all green plants. We must also draw to a conclusion that they all have green fingers. Seeing that they are green plants, it wouldn't make sense if their hands weren't green.

We must know the characteristics of all consumers before knowing our rights. Recognize your category here. Primary Consumers are herbivorous. In the human world, this is more commonly known as "vegetarians". All they eat is vegetable this and vegetable that. They are over-obsessive over their health. They have abnormal human qualities and can be easily recognized by the funny diet they opt for and the weird teeth (if you look closely enough). Their natural counterparts are just as well always eating up plants (which help in giving out oxygen during the day, provide us with food.......). An obvious conclusion can be drawn here too : Primary Consumers are pests.

The Secondary Consumer comes up next. This is the most common category as most humans fall under it. This is the omnivorous category. The laymen term for people classified here is "normal". There are subcategories here too. The Heavy Consumers, the Healthy Consumers and the Light Consumers. The Light consumers spend a lot of time looking for food under the Sun (light!!). These people appear smaller-sized than others because of the extra time spent on looking for food. These people lack street-smartness as indoor food is clearly provided. The Healthy Consumers are a notch above their peers. These are neither vegetarian nor over-eaters. They just eat healthily--VERY healthily. The Heavy Eaters beat everyone else. Their IQ is deemed the highest as they adapt quickly to changes and food trends. Therefore, their size must be equal to their IQ level.

The Tertiary Consumer is not a category you want to forget. There are 2 subcategories here. The Cannibal and the Carnivor. Many "species" fall under these categories but you wouldn't want to know them all. These people eat meat. ONLY meat. So, stay away from them if they tell you they're hungry.

The Producer has the control over the whole food chain. If the Producers jack up the price, everyone in the human food chain is affected. Recession (inflation) can occur in a case like this.

Now, the rights. The Primary Consumer has its rights to complain to a producer when dissatisfied with service/product given. Unfortunately, like their natural counterparts, green plants do not respond when being talked to as there is no mouth to speak with. That's why Primary Consumers must be sympathised. The higher authorities don't do anything either because they are too high to care about mortal problems dealing with consumers.

The Secondary Consumer here has MANY many many rights. Seeing that they are omnivorous, they can also try out the producers. If they are dissatisfied, they can complain (in vain) OR they can eat up the Primary Consumers. At least "Secondarians" have a choice.

The Tertiary Consumer has nothing to do with this food chain whatsoever. It is merely in the chain for show. It does not affect anything. All it does is get food--from others. These are basically called opportunist and must be spotted and eliminated immediately before further accidents happen.

This is pretty much my make-up composition. There was not much time left for other freak additions.

Lastly, Happy B'day Ghee Ken.
-Owh hey...I got an idea....I'll dedicate 2600 words to him!! (A-Z)...In the next post...

2 Comment(s):

Black said...

Wow.

You sure write a lot.

Don't bother with the 2600 words.

Please.

By the way, I love the widgets and the "smart computer".

Thanks for hours of idiotic enjoyment.


Cheers,
Black.

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