Debate Workshop

Debate Workshop
Then, there was today. Quite an "amusing" day on my behalf. April Fools are abundant wherever you go and today seems to prove just that.

I arrived in school to find myself being surrounded by all the other English freaks of the school. I stuck by Melissa's side as she was a mosquito magnet, which made me safe from mosquito attacks. I was scaring almost everyone when I said I brought a scrabble word list along. Suddenly, everyone seemed to back away, as if the nerdy virus was contagious or something. We went to HELP college without Ghee Ken, the second scrabble freak of the school (he went for Ceng Beng).

Once there, we helped ourselves with glorious food. The sandwiches were great (No, they're not heavenly. Just ordinary). After our quick breakfast, we made our way to level 4. The debaters would be in the auditorium while the "trainees" attending the workshop would be in another sad room.

Us Form 3s, being "trainees", had to be separated from our legendary counterparts. We shedded our respectable DJ debater roles and went into full-kiddy mode (or maybe that just applied to me). Melanie (she wasn't wearing her prefect uniform) was really fooling around, hunting for "cute" guys. She obviously had nothing better to do. I borrowed Daniel's blazer (the prefects except Krystle and Melanie brought their blazers along so as to look "professional"). Oops, those 2 prefects are only Daniel and Shu Wen.

Anyway, Melanie found out that some guy's name was Christopher after amusing herself by having eye contacts with people around the room. All I did the whole time was to bore Emily, Daniel and Shu Wen about scrabble, scrabble and scrabble. Apparently, I noticed I was the noisiest person overall, losing only to Melanie. I think everyone thought I was mad, talking so animatedly about a boring topic called Scrabble. Luckily the room wasn't half full yet. Yet.

All of a sudden, the whole room turned into a carnival, with people walking and running everywhere. Then, us DJians were saying something about a black-shirted guy who was Daniel's cousin being present. After a few seconds of topsy-turviness, we made new friends when Melanie introduced yet another guy (sigh) to us named Kar Jin.

Since no one was sitting on my left, some guy had to squeeze in (geez, of all spots). Then, he introduced himself as Kai Hung and said he was from Methodist Boys School (MBS) a.k.a. Monkey Boys School. Amusing. After figuring he should be intelligent enough, I started to strike an intellectual conversation regarding scrabble in his school, but failed to get any results except lots of groaning and moaning from my schoolmates.

Then, we met another girl named Juliana from some school. (Melanie makes friends fast).

After a while, a few people called all the Form 4 students over to the auditorium. Thinking it would be better there, Natasha, Zi Ying and I ran over to check out what's up. Actually, Form 3's weren't allowed there, but being DJians (proud smirk), Pn Tan gave us the unauthorized permission to masquerade as Form 4 students for the day and sit there in the auditorium. So, the 3 of us ran around like kids here and there to call our fellow friends. The MBS people weren't convinced and said that the smaller room was better (we had to watch the workshope from the other room through a small screen). I won't pick that option.

And so, we went to the auditorium and I ended up sitting behind a guy with extremely spiky hair. After a while, the MBS came to join us in the auditorium and sat behind us. I managed to squash most of the major points in one A4 page while Natasha had to go and waste paper.

I noticed I couldn't see the screen that clearly from the beginning. The spiky hair in front of me didn't make matters any better. If the guy sat up straight, his hair looked as if it were eating up the speaker who was busy pointing out important winning factors. When he tilted his head to the right, his hair would completely pulverize the speaker. His hair also ate up part of the screen, which caused more problems. At one point, I just wanted to act uncivilized, lick my 2 palms, and just push all his hair down flat on his head. Sadly, I didn't have the guts to do that. I was sitting next to a teacher.

During one point Mr Latif, the workshop speaker, said that adding statistical analysis in your argument doesn't necessarily determine the outcome of the debate. At that point, I got so frustrated with out loss I actually said out loud, "Screw that debate round......". The guy in front of me and his friend turned behind to see a cartoon agonizing over some funny problem. Our adjudicator was in the toilet and didn't hear that!!! AAAAAAhhhhhhh. Pn Tan!!! Why? Why? Why?

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm being kiasu.

After that moment, the guy in front kept looking behind at me, as if I was some serial killer or something, waiting to pounce and lash at him (okay, maybe that was what I planned to do anyway).

At the end of the 1st session, we had a break. Out of nowhere, the guy in front of me asked me what school we (bunch of freaks) were from. Natasha and I were like, "DJ, Damansara Jaya!" And I think the guy is some sort of psychic because he asked me after that, "Was my hair blocking you?"

Gosh, that was amusing. I didn't even say that to anyone. And then, he called Zi Ying and Natasha and I were surprised. Zi Ying and him were from the same class last time (meaning he was same age as us, get it?) and apparently, HE was Daniel's cousin. I think he changed his shirt or something (or maybe my ears need changing). Big whoops. Fortunately I didn't have the guts to be mean to him, otherwise I would end up as DJ's prefectorial target of harassment. Oh, he was quite good-looking too, anyway. (I'm sorry, Daniel. Don't tell your cousin what I said about the fingers one......oops....).

We were further interrogated by Daniel's cousin (I'm even more sorry here, since I did not find out what his name was) about what form we were in. [I'll just call this guy DC until he gets a name from either Zi Ying or Daniel himself].

To be very sure of our circumstances, Zi Ying and I went down to question Latif personally. While waiting, we heard some pretty amusing questions being asked as well. When it finally came to our turn, he asked which school we came from. When we answered "DJ for Damansara Jaya," you should have seen everyone's reactions. All those students from other schools gasped as though they just saw ghosts. Oh, this is what you get for being in the top debating school. It was awesome when the Form 4 students stared at us with awe and respect. Even the college kids were staring at us like heroes. That was, until we mentioned we were "trainees".

The atmosphere wasn't that serious, actually. The debaters preparing for the mock debate were quite funny. The opposition leader kept mentioning loudly that the microphone makes him sound weird. The opposition's second speaker was smiling everywhere the whole time. The prime minister was saying random things like:
1. The government's stand is that the guy over there should change his hairstyle......
2. The government believes that the chicken crossed the road......

After that, Zi Ying and I went to toilet and I followed her to the other room to get her long lost bottle. Finally.......after an eternity, we went back to our seats in peace.

All our places were reshuffled except the Mels, Zi Ying, Natasha and I. The rest of the DJ Form 3s were in the middle of the auditorium. At first, I wanted to asked the lot of us to move further in front, but it seems that everyone was doing that at the same time. Even the spiky hair dude was moving forward, although I think they wanted to squash between the 2 DJ gangs at first. I saw them coming in our row at first (Aww, I think the DC fellow missed Zi Ying and wanted to be near her or something). Or maybe the moving forward thought occurred on everyone's minds at the same time.

Darn. And I thought aliens' minds were supposed to be more advanced than puny humans.

Speaking of humans, Melanie just found out a rather disturbing fact about the MBS guy. He actually asked her if *ahemiahem* was single. Be nice to nerds, man. Shudders. And Natasha asked to say "I have a boyfriend"? Humans, humans. Sad....and he did sit next to *cough* and Nat dared to point he was flirting. Earthlings these days....Forgive them.

Aaaaaaaaaand......the mock debate started. The motion was something that went along the lines of "The Government would pay for cosmetic surgery" or something like that. The Prime Minister wasn't that strong after all. My favourite speakers were....very different in manner, so I liked all 3 OPPOSITION speakers. The first speaker was very precise and liked to make fun of the proposition's ideas and call the ideas crazy (oh, did I mention he started off his speech by asking the members on the floor whether we could hear him without the mic because it made him sound weird). The 2nd opposition speaker was very sarcastic and finds pleasure in insults. At one point, he even insulted the Prime Minister (of the debate, not of the country). Overall, he was good as he didn't stammer at all. The 3rd Oppo speaker was so calm and amusingly funny.

To quote a few lines from them:
You would rather pay for people who need cosmetic surgery than for those who are dying. That's crazy. [1]
Cosmetic surgery is not allowed in Muslim. So, you are not benefiting the 60% of Muslims in the country, equivalent to neglecting them. [1]
Have you heard of exercise, sir? [2]
How many fat, poor people have you seen? (After he mentioned that these people got fat after eating a lot. Eating a lot requires money, so these people aren't poor at all). [2]
The speaker could do with liposuction, yet he seems confident enough. (Whoa!) [2]
It's your turn to warm your seats. [3]

There are more, but these are the more memorable ones I've stored.

Many people found the 3rd Proposition speaker quite irritating. Apart from her squeaky voice, she was quite short-tempered and kept asking the poor Oppositions to "continue warming their seats as they were not warm enough" whenever they wanted to POI. At some point when they couldn't take it anymore, all 3 Opposition speakers stood up at once, which was a pretty cool sight.

The reply speech was weird. Everyone was expecting the Proposition's 2nd speaker to be doing the reply, but it was their first speaker doing it. That was like some mistake or something. Anticlimax.

After the mock debate, Zi Ying helped me look for the mechanical pencil I dropped as I was cheering for the cool 2nd Oppo speaker. Then, both of us went for lunch.

The queue for food was crazy. There were, however, 2 lines. Very long lines. Well, one was actually shorter than the other. And people were weird because no one wanted to go to the shorter line. We saw DC there and 3 of us started talking animatedly about the mock debate. Somehow, Zi Ying and I were so animated, we followed DC who took the longer lane. Everyone who came after us followed suit and no one else took the short lane anymore.

When we were nearing the food (at last!), the shorter lane was already nearly empty. DC offered to go check out what difference there was in that line. He quickly came back and said that the other line was for vegetarians. After a while, the place was completely empty and there was a kind school who told us to line up there. I explained why no one was there and they said all the food was the same.

The truth was simple. I'm hungry. So I don't really care whether it's vegetarian or not, it's still edible. In my final attempt to get food, I rushed over and Natasha followed me. It was only then that DC swapped lines and followed us (geez, was he dreaming before this?? Vegetarian food.....?) [And Zi Ying, if he was following someone, it'll be Natasha. I just provide laughter]. And all those pesky followers behind the long line started to shift. Zi Ying refused to move because "once a guy comes up with a plan, he sticks to the plan".

Firstly, Zi Ying isn't a guy. And the whole plan is to get food. Fast.

The food was great. And somehow, I just started talking nonsense from lunch onwards. Abhilaash thought I was weird, since I was trying to debate the "fact" that aliens breath nitrogen gas.

When we were waiting ouside the auditorium after lunch (for the competition balloting, which we didn't join), I was nearly screaming : Aliens have invaded our brains. Therefore, our brains absorb nitrogen. Daniel and Shu Wen were taking pictures of me screaming so that they can send my picture to the world's leading scientists for further studies to be carried out. Not quite the smartest thing to do after all.

"Brains don't absorb nitrogen! Listen to us! Who's the real alien here?!?........Oh yeah, you are."
-Daniel Ong-

Very amusing.

DJ is against Sri Aman.

That pretty much wraps up my whole week.

I'm looking forward to more workshops in colleges. The food is great. (Minus the distractions).